An {Almost} Adoptive Mother’s Plea

Dear Readers:

Today, I look like desperation. In every sense of the word. I have learned the hard way in life to be assertive in asking for my needs, and today, I have a heavy heart as I ask for this one to be met. I don’t ask out of want, or entitlement, or expectation. Instead, it is out of humility, desperation and the need for support.

Nate and I have been in the adoption process since about June. We have slaved over paperwork, stressed over finances and been overjoyed as we thought we had finally arrived this week, to the point of a completed home study and that we would be able to start showing our profile to birth moms within the next couple of weeks. However, today our funding came in at less than half of what we thought, which means we still need around $20,000 before our profile can even start being considered by birth moms.

And the truth is, we don’t have that money. We know we have the means to support a child, and we both feel so strongly that we are meant to be parents. In fact, that’s all we really want out of life. Yes we want to succeed and we want to be happy, and all the humanly natural things people want out of life, we want too… But more than that we want to make others happy. We want to change lives and bring people to Christ, and we want to do that through a large family. And this is why we’re enlisting your help. Because we need it.

Last week Nate woke me up around 6:30 am to tell me about a dream he had. He said he’d been awake for the last thirty minutes just thinking about the dream trying to remember every detail of it. He said he never wanted to forget this dream. He went on to tell me about how it was about the day we were privileged enough to adopt our beautiful baby. It was a bi-racial little girl with curly hair, a cute nose with a flat bridge, and she was truly beautiful. Though she was only a few days old, Nate said, she looked at him and said “I’m sorry I took so long.”

After he told me we laid in bed thinking about that baby girl. I realized, finally that this dream of becoming a parent, was not just a dream. That girl is out there, in heaven, on earth, I don’t know. But she exists. And she is ours. Divinely chosen to be in our family. We know she will come. And our lives will be richly blessed because of her. And all our other children. I know that.

Today, she feels so far away. But I hold on to the thought of her. I know she may not come first, or even second, she may come last, but I know she will come and I won’t give up until I have all the children God has in store for me.

That being said, I also know that I have a child waiting for us to gather the funds, however we can, and be ready for them. It may be our baby girl. It may not be. But this is what I do know… I don’t want any of my children to live one day longer than needed away from us. The thought of them being ready to come here, and me not being ready, hurts. I want to always be prepared for those sacred Littles the second they are ready to come home to me.

And so I ask, in desperation, that you donate, even just a dollar, you spread the word, and you pray for us. We need our kids more than they need us. Please help us find them.

There is a link on the right hand side of this blog, or you can donate by going to or All funds will be used only for adoption costs and expenses. Please be assured of that. If you are concerned, the second link deposits money only to our adoption agency to be used in our name.

Thank you again for taking the time to read, donate and share.

Love always,


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